In November we mentioned using a team-based approach to assist in oppressive marital relationships. Regardless of how we help, we have the same responsibility and priority.
What is that priority? The victim’s safety, dignity, and care are the primary priority for each member of the shepherding team and local church.
An individual who has lived under oppression will follow the lead of those in positions of power and authority because she’s learned she must, or face punishment. Therefore, until others exercise their power for her, instead of over her, she will seldom advocate for and speak up for herself and her children.
When interacting with victims and their children, we have opportunities, like Jesus, to touch the disgraced, see the invisible and needy, and be generous with the poor and vulnerable. This is God with Us–Emmanuel, the wonder and beauty of His incarnation.
When one person misuses power over another (or the household), Jesus stands between the two. In His place, we want to hear the needs and requests of the hurting individual and impose them on the oppressor. We provide the disadvantaged with available resources and information, so she can make informed decisions. We believe the reality of what’s been demonstrated by the perpetrator, holding out consequences instead of “believing the best” and “giving grace” because that’s not loving for the perpetrator or the victim.
Jesus would listen to everything, ask to hear more, and express compassion to someone who’s been habitually, heinously sinned against for years and years. He would not criticize the state of her home, dress, or children’s behavior. He would not give equal weight to the abuser or those who speak in the abuser’s place. Jesus would not heap falsehood and grief on her head. He would not use the perpetrator’s words to interrogate her. Instead, he would make room for inconsistencies, pieces and parts of stories and experiences, hours of weeping, sharing, questioning, and second-guessing.
How do we know? Because it’s what He does. He does this day after day, hour after hour. It’s not that He takes responsibility that belongs to others–namely, His church–but He listens, hears, gives grace, mercy, comfort, and practical aid. Do we not yearn to do the same?
Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? (Romans 8:34-35a)
Request Light in the Darkness Training for your leadership or congregation (available via zoom for $25/person; 5 hours)
Sign up for the Biblical Victim Care Course which will begin January 1 as an asynchronous course. 12 weeks; 25 CEU’s; $300
Sincerely,
Clarity in Action Ministries Board of Directors:
| President: Sydney Millage | Vice-President: Karen Miller |
| Treasurer: Jamie Julius | Secretary: Jessica Cox |
| Director: Floyd Yutzy |
Like us on Facebook. Follow us on Instagram or Twitter.
*If you don’t understand what this looks like, check out the following resources:
37 Ways to be Taken Captive: Warning and Prevention for Destructive Relationships
Domestic Abuse: Recognize, Respond, Rescue
Is it Abuse? A Biblical Guide to Identifying Domestic Abuse and Helping Victims
0 Comments